Flies on the wall

If you were the cable guy, a client of dylan's, or a door-to-door salesman stopping by, you might overhear conversations like this:

Me: Landon why are your pants wet?

Landon: I got them out of the laundry.

Me: You mean you pulled the pants that you pooped in earlier out of the hamper and put them back on?!

Landon: I want to wear these jeans. I'll wipe them off with a towel.

Me: YOU CAN'T WEAR PANTS THAT YOU POOPED IN!

Landon: crying and screaming as I take them off him and put them back into the laundry.